sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
