At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
operation have a gay friend backfired
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
