you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
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