ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
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