He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I wear drunk well.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize