worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize