a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Randomize
