i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize
