I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
this will be a night to untag.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Just invented taco cereal.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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