i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
