i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
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