nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize