Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Randomize
