just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I am midnight drunk by noon
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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