OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
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