He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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