You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
