No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
