we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
