...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
