Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I'm passing your future prison.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
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