Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
