Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
God, I missed his penis.
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