My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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