You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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