All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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