I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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