we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
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Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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