butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Congratulations! We have a period
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