You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
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