just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
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