he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
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