shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I think I died a long time ago.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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