hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
