I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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