yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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