sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
We got so high we made milksteak
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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