She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
