All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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