And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
