no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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