Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I just forgot I was standing up.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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