I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
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You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
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Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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