i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
Randomize
