More tranny stories later!
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
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