For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
