Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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