I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
