Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
