i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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