if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
