Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
Randomize
